Every time I clip my toenails there is
an unbearable screech that can be heard for miles around. It is a
tremendous force that shakes me to my core. It does not, however,
come from me. Nor does it come from my toenails – which, arguably,
could be consider a part of me that I've cut off. Regardless, the
screech is incredibly painful.
Yet, what is a person to do? Don't cut
the toenail and they grow to such a long length that feet become
painful, or they can curl around and make walking unpleasant.
There is something so pleasant about
ridding myself of those pesky hard shells. There is, perhaps, a
reminder that things change in a rather nonchalant and unnoticed way.
We don't feel the nails growing. There isn't any real problem with
them until they've grown too long, but then there is a real problem
with them.
That screech, though. That bloody
fucking screech. It feels like it will never end even though it
lasts for seconds. The screech is so loud that it is deafening,
painful, and borderline killer.
There is something about it that I miss
once I stop clipping those damn things, though. Maybe it is that the
sounds feel like home. I'd like the say it is the action itself but
I know that isn't true. I find it rather dull, to be completely
honest.
Maybe it is that satisfaction I feel
after the screeches stop.
Actually, I'm sure that is what it is.
There is a feeling of accomplishment every time that wretched sound
is cleansed from my ears. It is like I've had some grand successful
mission, a huge accomplishment that only a minor amount of people
have been able to complete.
Truthfully, though, it just feels like
letting go of the past.
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